Dear Egypt, Fuck You! From Japan

February 18, 2011

Dear Egypt, Fuck You! From Japan

Why should you give a shit that Egypt is in flames?

You shouldn't. Who cares if a bunch of creepy Egyptians want to go nuts and burn down their own shit and ransack their crap museums?

I sure don't. While you were all acting like spoiled children, I was eating and drinking. I got a lot of tasty treats to stuff my face with here in the city.

As long as Japan is the # 1 priority in getting the best food in the world I don't care what the fuck they do. I can barely keep up with the Kardashians !

Tttttttttaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssttttttttttttyyyyyy it is!

Ah yeah!

Oh my!

What a variety of treats!

I ain't saying nothing, but your country has really let itself go over the past thousand years. You are truly a useless and filthy nation who doesn't even have oil! Find some so I can cruise around town in my Prius and go shopping. You are all poor man's Arabs and nobody gives a fuck about you other than your stupid pyramids. It was a slow news week so you got a lot of coverage. It's over. I couldn't even watch my CNN for a week cause I was so tired of seeing your idiot citizens misbehaving.

The last time I was in your shit, pathetic excuse for a country, I was nearly raped by middle aged, moustached men dressed in white. Those run down, tourist trap pyramids which were designed to serve as a gigantic stairways by which the soul of the deceased pharaohs could ascend to the heavens, are now just pathetic stops for busloads of wealthy, white schoolchildren. And, you, Mr. Egyptian, have harassed, cheated and robbed many.
The foreigners you love to leer at, rob, rip off and rape are going to stop coming for a while. Now you can all have fun schucking a dick in the desert !